
flornholio
1554
20
2

Following up on @acetech09 's epic post suggesting pop-tart/whiskey pairings, we decided to accept the challenge and do actual pop-tart and whiskey pairings over the holiday.
First-up is Asbach Uralt - a German brandy, made in the Rhine River Valley just outside of Frankfurt. This is a lovely 12yr "blue label" version.
Carmely and sweet, this proved to be a fine pairing with the otherwise unremarkable, if not slightly confused, S'mores Pop Tart. "I'm a pastry, I'm a marshmallow, I'm a chocolate" - just pick one and commit to it Kellogg.
Ruling: Acceptable

While our thumbs up and down looks like a split decision, it was in fact not.
The Barbershop Rye is a fine whiskey, and is fairly mild as Rye whiskeys go. We felt that it would balance well with the blueberry.
But here's the thing, looking at the ingredients label on these particular Pop Tarts (don't do this, ever) - grapes and apples are right behind blueberries on the list. These are Grape-Tarts not Blueberry Tarts, and the grapes are just overpowering - these are just terrible Pop Tarts.
No pairings that we could think of that would hold up well to the slightly chemically, confused flavor of these 'Tarts. This is one of those bad-songs-sung-well moments, just no way this will work.
Ruling: Unrecoverable error

This was the surprise pairing of the day, especially given the experience with the Blueberry.
We were braced for a similar chemical "x-factor" that we'd have to try and balance. Choosing the Nikka Coffee Grain was a bit of a punt, and was chosen specifically because it is a very clean and balanced whiskey and shouldn't compete with any other flavors in the mix.
Here's the thing, turns out the Strawberry tart is a fine tart, and the strawberry actually really comes through despite the inclusion of pears and apples in the mix.
As expected, the Nikka didn't compete, dissolved the fat and sugar well on the palate, and was a pretty remarkable experience - as pop-tarts and whiskeys go.
Ruling: Enjoyable

Moving slightly more upscale, we now move to Chivas 18 and Brown Sugar and Cinnamon tarts. We felt this would be an easy pairing, and in hindsight might be actually better paired with bourbons, but the Chivas is a very clean whiskey and again felt would not compete and instead pair well.
The aromatics of the Brown Sugar and Cinnamon tarts are exceptional and I am thinking about hanging one from the rear-view mirror so I can re-live the smell again and again.
Despite that, the Chivas really didn't stand up to these particular tarts. While it didn't detract, it also didn't add to the experience. Each fine on their own, but sort of like a date ending in a hand-shake, it's fine, but not something I'd go out of my way to do again.
Ruling: Swipe left

The real drop-kick of the event, Ardbeg (Corryvreckan) and Chocolate Fudge. This is a big whiskey, full of smoky character, slight band-aid qualities, and at 57% ABV it was going to be a real tough one to match up.
That being said, Chocolate can be a beast of a flavor on it's own. So in a Clash-of-the-Titans spirit, we decided we'd unleash these beasts on each other and see what happens.
In a word, the outcome was simply heaven. We did add a few drops of water to the Ardbeg just to bring it into the same universe as the tarts, and the smokey character of the whiskey turned the tarts into a some-sort-of mole in the mouth. The band-aid qualities of the whiskey did well to augment the slight chemical flavor of this otherwise finely processed tart. And the severe alcohol levels did well to dissolve and disperse the fats and flavors around the mouth.
Ruling: Epic - would do again

Cat-tax: Steve.
acetech09
You absolute maniac. Well done.
EmsEsq
Well... Ardbeg, so yeah.
riddmkidd
Mole in the mouth is always a nice, even when unexpected, treat.
aShogunNamedMarcus
Ardbeg Corry, Ashbach and Nikka Coffey are all winners in my book
Choose2bKind
Instructions unclear: did you toast the PopTarts first??
flornholio
Tarts were indeed toasted. Several scientifically controlled experiments landed us at “5” as the ideal toast level.