CALAMOSCOPYJANE
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Been through many painful realizations lately, but that's what it means to do "the work", and I'm much happier and a better person as a result. We're happiest when we're growing. Progressing in some way. Step by step. It's a slow process, but if it helps us to love ourselves more then it can only bring about peace.
Peace to all of you.
OwlFarm
Who said "don't look back"? Don't believe em. You go for that corner seat in the restaurant. Cause they're gonna try to get behind you.
Zainadin
Yes therapy helps and I've had to had a few conversations with the kid inside me about how I'm here now and we've made it through the past, nothing was really his fault either. I have begun to forgive myself for things that weren't my fault to begin with.
coothlesscthulhu
Gotta remember to thank my past self occasionally too. Whether we are talking child me or yesterday me, he's the only reason I'm still alive.
CALAMOSCOPYJANE
Agreed, I don't thank party me enough either. Thx for the reminder.
TheColorsOfRain
Nostradamuswaswrong
Meh. You can make me grow old, you can’t make me grow up.
GCRust
People want to go back to "Simpler times". Times were never simple. We were.
imacmadman
Fact.
dissonantcognition
We need to be the parents we needed as children. To ourselves. To our children, if applicable.
Blabulus
My Dad's been dead for 10 years and Im still arguing with his ghost! Its hard to move on!
DSREX
As a young adult, I made the promise that I would be the father I never had. Be the person you needed when you were young.
kerrigan778
I'm not looking back but I want to look around me now, see more of the people and places that surround me now. I let my past go too fast, I let my skin get too thin, innocence slips away. Time stand still.
Plagen
You only have to be an adult while you're working. The rest of the time is yours. Be a kid. Buy a cake just to eat it. Play with legos. Unless of course, you already have kids yourself. In which case, you messed up. Wait till they're 18.
zagibu
Most people don't live in a social vacuum.
framentedpolitics69
Going to therapy for this on Wednesday. Good to know I’m not alone
CALAMOSCOPYJANE
You are definitely not alone.
WeHaventMet
Quit whining and develop a daddy kink like the rest of us.
CrimeBrulee
You're an adult now, you can tend to your inner child and heal.
Jordan7831
RNFlatus
Thank you! I needed that laugh
Jordan7831
No problem!
roylbolinger
This is my truth right here. I needed to read this today. Thank you
grandestgrandeur
That I'm far more fragile than I ever thought I was and I didn't realize just how much my mother supported me, even when I was an utter brat, until she was gone. I realize now, not only just how much she was my emotional rock, but also how much she shielded me from just how toxic my other family members were.
gewalt
my significant other takes over when my inner child needs adult supervision. I do the same for her.
3Davideo
What do you do if they both happen at once?
sqrtman
Eat icecream on steak and watch cartoons all day.
TooUglyToAltarBoy
I've seen enough strange cooking shows to know that's just a lazy gastrique.
sqrtman
Together
TinyOctopus
This is true. This is also one of tiny octopus' core beliefs when it comes to the tiniers. Not to repeat the mistakes his parents made, but to be the parent that tiny octopus needed when he was the tiniers' ages and making the same mistakes he made when he was their age. Be the person you needed when you were that age in that situation. Break the cycle. Also, *hug*, tiny octopus is sorry that you're part of this generation of emotionally neglected kids.
CALAMOSCOPYJANE
Thanks, tinyoctopus.
JustFeedMePieDammit
That’s a big oof
reddenbocker
My most painful realization about myself was also about the people I held closest to me. my family doesn't really care what happens to me. At the worst point in time, when I had no job, no funds and was looking around for prospects, they got me thrown out of my home to live on the streets because 'I needed to learn what the real world was like.' I haven't learned anything I didn't already know, other than that my siblings thought I deserved suffering and homelessness.
CALAMOSCOPYJANE
I'm sorry that happened to you, I had similar parents and they're awful people. I how you get away from them like I did. Shut the door on them and don't open it.
forensicfilesbestofseason1
I don’t remember much of my childhood but the shitty stuff really sticks out. But at least I can buy all the toys I want now and I don’t have to see my dad or go to school.
Mxlespxles
Promethianfire
I didn't ask for you to hurt me like this.
Layloe
WitchUndertones
I wasn't and I wasn't. At least what I did in my 20s made my 30s good
ATastyCorpsesicle
Having different problems now doesn't invalidate the problems you had then.
eetsumkaus
I was happy as an 18 year old. I grew up and I'm even happier now
johnnyboy1996
At 18 I left everyone I knew and enlisted. I miss that drive I had sometimes
astrangehop
That's a huge commitment, but it's a big jump to doing what people tell you for a while.
ScottNapalm
Honestly sometimes I feel like the military is why I lost my drive.
dogmatix
nah, stuff being 18 again. I'll take being 21 again - when I was (finally) getting laid. But honestly I love being where I am right now
aminalhouse
I mean I’ve never been happy, at least as far as my aspirational neurotransmitters and synapses would define it. Not even once
mentallychallengeaccepted
Reaaaally can’t relate to this one. I was addicted to amphetamine and tried to kill myself at 19. Being 30 and sober from drugs fucking rocks
pip1
Well looook at you and your progress! But ye, can relate
Mxlespxles
Glad you got out of the cycle, man, holy shit
praxis17
Good for you friend
JemIsTrulyOutrageous
The irony. I am the safest I've ever been, the most secure I've ever been, with the first person that listens, respects me, and shows love through care and understanding... And I am a fucking mess. Being in a place to finally be vulnerable has opened up the floodgates, pointed out missing pieces. I realized I was functioning on survival for so long I buried/masked a lot. Its also given me space to care about the world and I cannot tap out of it and am overwhelmed.
aminalhouse
There was a poetry to the rhythm of this.
MotionOfTheOcean
farfie
I broke completely 7 years ago now, in the middle of my thus far most important relationship in my life. It was a mess and has left me scarred. I'm still not okay, between the stress, the flashbacks and anxiety. But: I gained perspective on life. I'm no longer brushing things under the rug, my actions have had consequences for me and others. I care about morality now. I'm full-steam ahead on being the change I want to see in the world. It's tiring, this immense work, but well worth it.
farfie
My only wishes are that my hobbies become engaging and fun again, that I heal from the shit I've done and the shit that's been done to me. That I can integrate the memories of what happened.
zFUBARz
My uncle today was saying how great it was being 40, could go hard all the time and I'm just like dude, but when you're in that range you're only thinking about when you were 30, and 30, you think about when you were 20. Chill old timer.
Szavor
Damn bro...
DaisyWarrior
Hashbrown123
11? Must be nice to start so late.
OddlyPacific
We got the woman and man We got the kids in a clan Only time will tell If all these dreams fit under one umbrella Step by step Day by day A fresh start over A different hand to play The deeper we fall The stronger we stay And we'll be better The second time around
Lexxatron02
getthismanabeer
HCBailly
gnomedeplume
and boy if anyone is intimately familiar with the hostility and unfairness of the universe it's this guy
LondoMollari58
That's such a good episode
OldWolfe
They're all good episodes. But by your name I see you know that.
TemplarMuse
This from the guy who made a warrior-caste Minbari bellow with laughter.
gnomedeplume
it could only be a British person beaten to within an inch of their life that could achieve that
Jamesstin
I dont get it. Why would that reality be a bad thing?
probablyshouldbedoingwork
Imagine COVID-19 Happened anyway but this time somehow we all deserved it. It was a punishment for every person who was impacted big or small. What did you do to deserve that?
probablyshouldbedoingwork
Nothing - none of us did. Life is just... chaotic. The sooner we come to terms with the unpredictability, and the fact that there is no 'innate' justice to the universe the happier we'll all be.
Mavgurian
You are approaching it from the wrong side. It is not about that the universe would give us what be deserve, but that bad things ARE happening and we would deserve them for some reason in that reality.
Thcksl
Thanks, I didn't remember this episode
CALAMOSCOPYJANE
Title is supposed to day, Don't LOOK back... Ugh posting is hurd.
majorminers
I go to therapy once sometimes twice a week. Ive made progress to the point that I now parent my mother as needed (I see her so rarely). Father is dead, thank fuck. My life is almost perfect. But I wallow in missing a childhood completely. Therapist said this "you stand in a doorway, one foot in the past, one in the future, pissing all over the present". And its helping. Dont look back is very apt. Thank you.
CALAMOSCOPYJANE
Omigosh "pissing all over the present" is AMAZING!!! thank you, I'll use that one. Glad to hear you're getting better. If you ever want to chat about therapy methods and modalities, hit me up.
Whenthepiecesaresmalltaketwo
I still knew what you meant!
Quizz25S
I think most people (including myself) didn't even notice. I did notice you say "day" though lol. Commenting is herd.
WafflesTasty
I think that guy's suggesting the entire opposite. DO look back at your childhood. Understand what went wrong. Be better
CALAMOSCOPYJANE
Maybe. It helps to understand one's childhood in order to purebred in therapy. The title was referring to a card somebody got me last year, that I have trapped to a mirror to remind me to push forward. It's more personal. I never thought this post would get so much attention! Should I do a "front page edit"? Or is that a bit twatwaffly?
CALAMOSCOPYJANE
PROGRESS not purebred wth I never use that word. Something is fucky....
catamenia
Hey man, no regrets! Own that title! Don't look back!
CALAMOSCOPYJANE
Lol nice yeah good point
nanabroccolifart
I realized they will never be parents at about 53 just had to give the idea of parents up and let them go…
Sasurau
A little voice inside my head said
“Don't look back, you can never look back”
WhichIsIt
Vibin’
CALAMOSCOPYJANE
Don HenleY FTW
fformulaa
You can always go back and change tha... oh damn. Imgur doesn't let you. It's never too late to change it by deleting and reposting!
IGotsDemGoodies
Hitting FP is the exact moment it becomes too late to delete and repost.
HedonistBeard
I think the whole "don't look back you're not going that way" message might be a bit muddled by that.
CALAMOSCOPYJANE
Nah it's no biggie
DrElihuWhipple
On a side note, *say
CALAMOSCOPYJANE
Yeah I noticed that too. I can't win.
DrElihuWhipple
It brightened a few people's day.
BatmansUnderPantsAreSoSoft
That movie was awesome
sospicy
I agree. I went in with the lowest expectations and was pleasantly surprised.
CannotBeBanned
Did we watch the same movie? This was a direct to VHS special. It just had good acting, but the story was too unbelievable
Arracor
What movie?
tzahtman
The Menu
itsmypeanut
Totally, wasn't sure what it was about but it held my attention. Ending was a bit dumb though, imo ^^
BatmansUnderPantsAreSoSoft
I dunno I loved that whole "I don't like your food" and went into that simple cheeseburger ordeal and gave her a doggy bag to go for calling him out and being honest?
itsmypeanut
Ye it was just too easy imo that she survived. Should have all died. No "happy" ending
BatmansUnderPantsAreSoSoft
I can get behind that. I was honestly expecting the burger to be poisoned