
SCPArchivist
135863
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Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-699 is to be kept in a standard 8 m x 8 m x 5 m research bay, which was built around the object in the sub-basement of Site-83. The object shall be guarded at all times by two Level 1 personnel who have had a “negative” reaction to the object (see below) and have shown no interest in opening it. In addition, the artifact is to be kept under video surveillance at all times.
Unauthorized attempts to open SCP-699 will be met with severe disciplinary procedures, up to and including termination. Any signs of an escape attempt by the contents of SCP-699 must immediately be reported to a Level 4 staff member, so that further containment procedures can be initiated. Any containment breach is to be met with full force.
Description: SCP-699 is a clear rectangular case 2.5 m x 1.5 m x 1 m in size. Engraved on one side is the SCP Foundation “Keter” symbol, and “SCP-17591.” The artifact appears to be plexiglass, but is in fact a super-dense polymer much stronger and heavier than any material currently manufactured. The weight of the object is estimated at 24,000 kg. SCP-699 shows no seams in its construction, and no obvious means of opening it. It has resisted all attempts to open, damage, or acquire a sample of the material it is composed of. Attempts to acquire a small sample of the material so that it can be reproduced are ongoing.
The contents of SCP-699 are under investigation and currently in dispute among researchers. The contents of SCP-699 are apparently telepathic and appear differently to most observers, depending upon their desires and psychological state.
90% of observers see the contents in a positive way – as something they want to possess or to release. These viewers have reported seeing precious metals, artwork, family members, pets, religious figures, and apparently useful technology contained in SCP-699, and experience a strong desire to open the container.
Approximately 9% of observers have a “negative” reaction to SCP-699’s contents, and view something frightening or dangerous. Reported contents have included spiders, snakes, demonic humanoids, and other dangerous SCP artifacts, including SCP-███. These observers do not exhibit any desire to release the contents of SCP-699.
Two observers, Dr. ████, and Dr. ██████, have observed the same thing when viewing SCP-699 — they claim it is entirely empty.
["It's obviously just a prank." — Dr. ████]
The contents of SCP-699 are capable of appearing in different forms simultaneously to multiple observers. Other than the form-masking telepathy, and the transmission of a desire to be released, SCP-699 has not attempted to communicate with anyone.
Addendum: SCP-699 was first discovered when it appeared in the third-floor break room of Site-83, at 3:14am on █/█/20██. Due to its weight, it immediately crashed through several floors of the site, landing undamaged in the sub-basement. Unfortunately, it caused $█ million in damage to the building, released SCP-███, and SCP-███ was crushed beneath it upon landing. SCP-699 is too heavy to move without causing major structural damage to Site-83, so containment was built around it.
A partial report on SCP-699 was found attached to the artifact:
[This report is for Level 4 and above eyes only. Unfortunately, most of the report was damaged when SCP-699 arrived, and is unreadable.]
Item: SCP-17591
Object Class: Keter
Date of Capture: 7/6/2455
Researcher-in-Charge: Dr. ████ B████
Notes:
7/6/2455 SCP-17591, who calls [report damaged] self [report damaged and unreadable] desires to impleme [report damaged]
referred to as “Protocol Z” within this document. As this is obviously undesirable, and given subject’s ability to [report damaged]
placed in a standard Keter-class containment vessel.
[report damaged]
Added [DATA EXPUNGED] to containment protocol to prevent [report damaged] after escape/recapture and extensive damage to Site-██. Ability to influ[report damaged] Protocol Z at a distance of 5 [report damaged] for concern.
8/7/2455 Escape attempts continue. Subversion of Site-███ personnel required termination of Dr. ██████ and Researcher ██████.
[report damaged]
2/7/2466 Escape imminent. Experimental Containment Procedure “T” to be implemented immediately. We believe the inhabitants of the receiving timeline lack the [report damaged] and will for many years.
[Note from the Records Clerk: I am not about to mess up our database and call this thing SCP-17591. It is SCP-699 until further notice.]
[Note from O5-█: Do not start tossing recalcitrant/dangerous artifacts into the nearest dimensional portal. It is clearly not safe for many of the items under our control, and there is significant debate among Senior Staff over whether it should ever be done.]
https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-699
https://the-scp.foundation/object/scp-699
aneyeholeman
The people who come up with these are so whimsically creative. Love reading SCPs
klarseth
Zahnradfee
This is obviously just a prank.
Derginsdrogalot
I love the SCP that was friendly and gave everyone e good vibes when near it.
gedankenmann
Why won't anyone listen to me. Its telepathic powers are far stronger than anyone realises. It got out of the containment shortly after the fall.
Eridianne
Ugh. And I just refilled all the machines in our break room. Typical.
Gayforbae
I mean, the room did break...
Illithidbane
Oh no, SCP-███ was crushed? That poor ███ deserved better!
Snooj
Not sure why the number is redacted. Just look through the files for an SCP that stopped functioning around that same date.
littlecoatfatguy
It knows what it ███ .
theDogter
Attempts open it will be met with severe punishment…. attempts to open it have been unsuccessful.
goflyblind
LadyCrickett
Subsequently, another item was added to Dr. Bright's list of things he cannot do.
KuroNeko00
That's a clever way to deal with something you can't destroy and can't allow to run free but that can telepathically influence observers to release it: Enclose it the most advanced material you have and then send it to a time period where they don't have the science to breach the enclosing material. The receiving timeline will eventually reach the required tech level to open it, but as they will be aware of the approaching problem for longer they will hopefully come up with a better solution.
LincLoud
Cool
Cranbananarama
...Drop it on SCP-682.
enheru
How'd they engrave it if they can't damage it?
AmITerryNow
It was sent back from the future as it's escape was imminent. Partial report from the future says they are certain the recipients would lack the tech/knowledge to deal with it. Future researchers probably had the ability to engrave it.
Nuttsy
Not just the ability to engrave it: The ability to manufacture standard containers out of the stuff!
awesomecat42
It was already engraved when it first appeared.
DoNotQuitYourDayJob
8m ~= 4 Dwayne Johnsons or 5.3 Dany DeVito
TheToasterIsLaughingAtMe
[REDACTED]
superanth
Dang do I ever love the high-end enigmatic SCPs. Great graphic BTW. Did you draw it yourself?
SCPArchivist
No, this is from someone’s YouTube thumbnail
Rodltwo
Ryebread91
So is it 17591 or 699?
MistoKat
Yes
Ryebread91
RobBobertyYT
17591 in the future (or alternate future timeline). But they sent it to the past, where they gave it the new designation of 699. They wouldn't use the 17591 as they are not up to that number yet, and they wouldn't just assume the report/engraving is truthful.
Ryebread91
Thanks
IVerifyPeoplesUsernames
90 percent see good, 9 percent see bad. What's the other 1 percent? The rich?
Nuttsy
Blank. Given the sample size of 2 researchers being 1%, we can extrapolate 200 individuals were exposed to the box.
TI99Kitty
Margin of error.
Someshithead241
They see nothing at all.
Someshithead241
I love that they just couldn't deal with it and decided to just yeet it into a portal for someone else to deal with.
montyman185
At least it was a portal to somewhere that wouldn't be able to open it.
Reidsb
I think that was the point. This thing is so good at manipulating that it was only a matter of time before someone was tricked into releasing it, given the description of a 'Standard' container. So they sent it somewhere that literally nobody could release it. If the foundation was smart they'd actively stop studying the container, lest they learn how to open it.
montyman185
That was the point, but it was also a temporary stopgap measure. I think there's been other instances of the foundation dumping problems on alternate reality versions, but if they make it a regular thing, they end up in a fight with all the alternate timelines trying to send shit back.
WuProgress
Heavenissize17socks
pixelscapes
Nice one. I wonder how they know what it’s made of, density, etc. when they can’t get a sample or accurate weight.
daroxd
A spectrometer can be used the elements of the atoms that a material is made of
Heavenissize17socks
Weight loads of the various floors it crashed thru.
pixelscapes
Which is how they estimated the overall weight. How do they know it’s specifically a “super-dense polymer” that is “heavier” compared to other polymers? That’s the sentence that puzzled me.
Heavenissize17socks
"Regulation CP: 241 :All Foundation levels will have floors of sufficient strength to bear weights exceeding that of the heaviest super dense polymers, "
TheExpatBrit
Bounce some light off it and see what the spectrographs say?
pixelscapes
Good idea, I’ll buy that.
MossyAbyss
"Future us are a bunch of rat bastards" - SCP Administration going over site expenses.
chbarts
All of the Groups of Interest, the Foundation included, are Rat Bastards. At best, their Rat Bastardry extends reality's existence.
Shadowborne
"Current us are a bunch of rat bastards" -SCP Administration in a moment of clarity.
MossyAbyss
"Oh, ya think"‽ - SCP Ethics Committee
MrRandom314159
"Shut up or they'll remember we exist" - SCP Ethics Commitee
redpandabanana
It could be future us or could be parallel universe future selves. No real way to know which kind of time travel if it’s time travel at all
Sageypie
I mean, SCP is rife with alternate dimensions just being absolute gobshites about their highly dangerous SCP's that they are unable to either secure, contain, or protect. And those other dimensions just chucking these super dangerous SCPs into other dimensions and leaving them as somebody else's problems.
Drakon2k2
They’re still rat bastards though.
redpandabanana
Oh no doubt
MossyAbyss
"Whomever, wherever, or whenever; they are, I repeat, Rat Bastards".
DropDrop
Not to be confused with SCP-69 which is a a portal that mirrors you but flipped upside down.
UnoriginalPieceOfRepeatingShit
Nice.
RevolutionOnHerLips
I don't get it? It's just a picture of Trump in prison orange stuck inside a glass box???
darksniperknight
Trump? My cat is in that box! I need to get her out!
fr0stbyte124
I feel no desire to remove it.
Gayforbae
I definitely don't wanna release that...
UnitConversionBot
8 m ≈ 26 feet or 13 washing machines
phobosorbust
but how many smug SI-using talking heads is that? I simply cannot understand the measurement unless it's converted to an inflammatory clickbait title unit!
UnitConversionBot
5 m ≈ 16 feet
UnitConversionBot
24,000 kg ≈ 3780 stone or 23.6 long tons
TechIsForEveryone
Can you convert to hamburgers per semi automatic rifle?
arguewithmeplz
What in the American measurements is going on?
UnitConversionBot
1 m ≈ 3 feet, 4 inches or 1.7 washing machines
Vyrro
Go home UnitConversionBot, you're drunk!
eggmuffin
Who the hell can squeeze 1.7 washing machines into a one-meter space?
Rezol
Top loaded ones are usually pretty narrow right
reverendfixxxer
The weight of SCP-699, apparently.
LrrrRulerofThePlanetOmicronPerseiVIII
It’s linear rather than cubic
eggmuffin
Well, shit. I need to get me one of those 2D appliances. 😋
redpandabanana
jojosburritoadvantages
... Washing machines!? Is this bot okay?
Noraver
What kind of washing machine is two feet wide lol
Kyen155
It's still hard at work...
JiggleboobMcSugartit
amazing usage of that gif
torcue
American bot trying it's best
MostAwesomeAveragePerson
Swedish bot, actually :)
AnonOmis1000
I wonder if when it appears to contain people, what the people do. Do they appear alive? Try to communicate? Or are they just like a ragdoll? Is the person someone the observer knows is free elsewhere?
RobBobertyYT
I think it acts like whatever it looks like because it is trying to convince people to release it. It doesn't sound like it compels you, though, so I wonder if the enclosure reduces some of its ability.
AnonOmis1000
While not explicitly stated, I think it implies a compulsion to release it. The reason I asked is because it is stated the entity has made no attempts at communication. To me that means when it appears to be a person, the person doesn't try to communicate.
Surisuule
If my wife appears in it normally, would she not if I was holding her hand? Would I be convinced she's really in it and the hand holder is a fake?
RobBobertyYT
Sounds like it doesn't compel you to believe it's real. It just looks like something you want to release (or the opposite)
AnonOmis1000
Other great questions
myotheralt
Only while you are within 5-----
BorgaSmorg
Well now I want to play Control again.
thereitis101
I liked it but it got confusing and eventually moved on to something else. Still though, the atmosphere was unique.
Comet260
How hard was it for you?
BorgaSmorg
Not very.
AlwaysUpvoteBunnies
DrPepper523
superanth
That about sums up the thoughts of pretty much every MTF team member I think.
sektorz
As much as I want to agree I'm sure it's like, well, they called us so someone fucked up .... AGAIN! kind of like the IT department of things.
Nuttsy
JesusChristbutifhewasaGamer
geekykeycap
https://www.etsy.com/listing/1305929732 not to be "that guy" but I make SCP computer keyboard keys by hand. I have more in my profile if anyone wants to see some cool shit. I'm also an author of an SCP article, but it only has around 50 points. I'm still proud of it.
5uperu5er
They look amazing!
geekykeycap
Thank you! I work very hard on them. I taught myself how to do it during the pandemic. Even wrote a program that turns svg files into 3d models. It's how I created all my work, including the SCP keycap. It's a lot of fun. I work with silicone, airbrush, acrylic paints, many resins, 3d printer, blender, inkscape... I love my hobby.
Valkyr1987
If I had an appropriate keyboard I would want these for my Ctrl keys
geekykeycap
That does seem wildly appropriate somehow haha
tradiuz
What profile are your caps?
geekykeycap
Cherry. I make them in row 4 (function and escape key which is taller) and row 2 (keys with letters on them basically.) Thanks for asking. I'm beginning to experiment with SA profile for the additional height, but currently all my designs fit within cherry row 4 and row 2.
tradiuz
Let me know if you ever get into XDA
geekykeycap
Will do! I've been meaning to explore more profiles to increase sales... Maybe after I make some cool SA designs I'll look at XDA.
DimwitF
Which one? I'd love to read it!
geekykeycap
https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-4811 thanks for asking. Id love your feedback. It's the first serious creative thing I've written in 15 years, and has flaws I can see looking back. I'm still proud of it but wish I'd dropped the exploration section to streamline it.
DimwitF
That's cool! Like a lot of objects, I start off thinking "this would be fun to own and use carefully", and by the end I think "No. No, I would Not like this." :D
geekykeycap
Those are my favorite kinda too! I appreciate the direction the community has moved in, telling stories with SCP items. Though I do often miss the older stories that focused more on a single item and natural fallout in its operation. Sometimes you don't want a grand epic, you know?
superanth
This was a *fantastic* SCP. Just the right amount of mystery, science, and “Whoops!”
geekykeycap
Thanks, I sincerely appreciate that. I even spoke with my wife about it since she had a medical career. I wanted a blend of engineering and medicine. I hope that the factory canon continues to expand as years pass.