sangatster
93318
1841
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I tried this out and IT WORKS!
Sometimes the simple examples are the best
These are spot on
Documenting deficiencies is an age-old, tested solution. Bring a marketing team in and it becomes a feature.
My point exactly
Is there no love for the aged?
For the coders out there
So much null, and so much controlled by null, yet fast as lightning.
flavivsaetivs
My friend used to be a Pascal Programmer, she confirmed the Pascal one is 100% accurate.
TheWhiteRat
#6
Everyfrigginnameistaken
Use Google's password creator and have Google remember it.
AdmJota
rescue(Castle.Occupants.Where(o => o.Title == Title.Princess).FirstOrDefault());
Misora
#1 follow all security protocols, change your password every 14 days. Get your account hacked because the site security had gaping holes.
scoundr3l
Trick I learned having a crazy ex: make all security answers "not ". Easy to remember and looks fishy if they try to guess.
deathventure
be careful when null returns a not null....
AlmostCertainlyNotPickles
Thanks lead management! Now I have a whole bunch of lightbulbs to paint! c:
redzombie
my boss was named Chad and when we had new hires, I told them to just set all the security answers to Chad and everyone remembered. <3Chad
turbodog
COBOL: pound the castle walls with brute force PROCEDURES
usernametakenisthestoryofmylife
Lightbulb is broken. Sighs, and learns to live in the dark.
The701
Some fun ones: Sites with complex password rules, but which don't tell you those rules until after you've filled in the forms and submitted,
HelpfulCorn
Our mainframe, which requires exactly 8 characters but doesn't tell you that
thislooksfun
What’s even worse is when they just say “an error occurred” and you have to work out the rules yourself.
The701
Ah yes, the "Swat the user with a newspaper and shout 'NO!'" approach to interface programming.
Chloramphenicol
#WorstPractices: Having a maximum password length and SILENTLY TRUNCATING YOUR ENTRY DOWN TO IT instead of throwing an error.
snotcaulk
I just ran into that a couple days ago. 20 char limit. NexusMods, I think. *shakes fist*
TuffyTDog
PayPal does this. The change form doesn't have a limit, but it gets truncated to 20, and your password won't be correct if you type the rest
sangatster
Oh that's just brilliant. Sure is secure though!
The701
only to be greeted with a slap in the face. Another one....really weird: No duplication of characters between the username and password.
The701
Seriously. Only the one site like that, for some specialized software. Yes, if your username was "Jeff701," then the password could not
The701
contain, anywhere in it, J, e, f, 7, 0, or 1, in any order or location. And it needed at least one capital, one lowercase, and one number.
Neo160
Thats extremely insecure. that just gives brute force attemps at accounts an easier ruleset to break in.
The701
Yyyyup. I'd also like to know why a few places, such as the one that holds my IRA, have implemented short *maximum* password lengths.
SuddenlySeymour
for java: first you need to make a castle building factory, even if you only want one.
TheMadCoder
#1 https://xkcd.com/936/ it pisses me off when people don't know the best way to make hard to brute force passwords is just make them long
dalaiyoda
You're not wrong, but most sites have limits on password length, like 8 chars, rendering the XKCD plan hard to implement in practice.
TheMadCoder
why the hell would you limit password length? Are their server hard drives really so small they couldn't store a few more characters?
dalaiyoda
You'd have to ask them why, but surely you're aware that it does happen? This can't possibly be news to a "mad coder".
Hypoxicith
Gold
alberteinsteinwasagreatmagician
to number 1: My skype password was gottheguitar7 and it got hacked. Don't know how exactly, but it did. Lesson learned: Use good passwords.
trigonman3
Information IT Tech Technology
CotterPyke
My golly, after 35 years they are still using Pascal?
v
TanithRosenbaum
Oh sweet summer child. :) Half of theoretical physics/chemistry/materials science is still actively coding and deploying new FORTRAN code...
CotterPyke
amazing! I fooled with that very same wayy back in the olden days of 1982 in a programming class...never dreamed its still around-
AdmJota
Yeah, but by all accounts, FORTRAN was a good language to begin with.
5NoteHalf
#1 As an IT support person, I tell them "Repeat after me: 'I'M FREEEE!' and go run around your desk in glee."
KRicci
....C++ is actually in my top 3 languages. Probably because the professor actually gave a damn
sangatster
I still think mixed C/C++ was the most productive once I locked down a string library I could live with. Well, pre-.NET Delphi was great.
5NoteHalf
Rescue the princess in PHP? Psssht. Easy. We once used PEAR to join a PHP frontend to a DBF which is part of a relational database backend.
5NoteHalf
And yes, we tried to get them to do it a different way. No they did not want to.
dannne
#1 choose a phrase instead of a word. They are longer and MUCH easier to remember. Gokuisthestrongestfighter88 super easy to remember.
Pokegeologist
For a while now I've been tempted to use profanities and racial slurs for passwords since they'd be hard to talk about and harder to guess.
Neo160
That actually makes accounts easier to brute force and far less secure. thats a tiny dictionary in comparison with regular language.
TheBurritoConfederacy
Correct horse battery stapler, but use profanity from multiple languages to increase the size of your word pool. :D
Pokegeologist
Love your screenname. That's a micronation I can get behind!
Impossibrew
pendejofuckmierda
Pokegeologist
Puropinchesuschisse
Pokegeologist
Oh, right, the robots doing the real work.
Pokegeologist
Part of my problem is I keep thinking of hackers as safe crackers. Those days are gone when you can just steal a bulldozer.
longnNoodleDriver
You forget manager, hire IT fix broken light and fire that guy after, later on cant find anybody know how to fix it
sangatster
Happens to a friend that does consulting all the time. Gets it all working, k bye.
Acronymicon
Onsite service technician- gets a crapload of forwarded and cc’d email chains concerning the room. “Nothing works”. Drives three hours /1
Acronymicon
To the site to find out the lightbulb is blown. Not a single mention of the lightbulb in the emails or texts or calls. Lightbulb is /2
Acronymicon
Missing, so they have to look up the documentation to find out what the wattage was. Documents unavailable or incomplete/wrong. Has to /3
Acronymicon
Call coworker that has worked there forever about an issue that should be easily solved but impossible. Coworker tells tech about /4
Acronymicon
A room up the hall that has a blue desk. Middle drawer on the right has a dozen light bulbs. Also sends link to replacement bulbs for /5
Acronymicon
Future use. Also tells you to let the guy at the desk know that “Lefty “ says what’s up. (He’ll know). Replace bulb in five seconds. /6
Acronymicon
Then drive three hours home. Spend an hour the next day writing elaborate email detailing all of the steps necessary to fix it next time/7
etopsirhc
i have a solution to the security question one, particularly the common first pet one, dont name your first, name your fav.
[deleted]
[deleted]
sangatster
Keeping it simple. I like.
BunnyBooBear69
Tbh I use the same string for every security question, therefore I never forget it.
erbiumyttriumytterbium
Random obscure references to fiction. Easy to remember, unrelated to your personal history, difficult to guess. First pets name? Fennick.
erbiumyttriumytterbium
Use a password manager for passwords. Different password for each site.
ifyouareacuntanyouknowitclapyourflaps
A friends bank security question for awhile was "Do bears shit in the woods?" His password was " You bet your ass" they made him change it..
sangatster
What troll monitors security questions and gets offended by them? Uuuuggggghhhhhhh :/
etopsirhc
he probably had to use it and the bank made them change it after cause the person complained.
ifyouareacuntanyouknowitclapyourflaps
This was it. He used it and then got a call that they don't allow "innapropriate security questions"
dalaiyoda
Bugger that. "Yes, my first pets name WAS Cunty McCuntface. Don't make me defile his memory by pretending otherwise!"
sangatster
I solved that by giving all my pets the same name
SuddenlySeymour
"Eric the bee?" "No, Eric the half-bee. He had an accident"
etopsirhc
mine isnt even my own pet. it was my mom's bosses pet
etopsirhc
and a gif to summarize programming.
dylodemps
Stolen from here (I'm the OP) https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6462856898000547840
sangatster
It's unbelievable how often this happens, and with home improvement too. Crazy.
WoeToHice
Ah, the art of yak shaving.
mattihase
Oh god yes!
Cr4zyC4tLady
This I my life, Every. Single. Day. Everyone else thinks I’m lazy but really I’m exhausted from doing so much
lemmesmashplease
I would just give up after the first obstacle. Yes, I am a quitter. Please don't judge me.
The701
Then when you exit the garage, you're suddenly in another state, and gravity only works at 40% of normal.
etopsirhc
https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-3-5wae13vi4/UXDI3tq7yVI/AAAAAAAAQ_4/j2WlzZ-Urag/w497-h373/photo.jpg
Pokegeologist
Trying to do my own IT right now and watching a full system meltdown at home. Not having a great time.
Tesfallout
IT guy here, pm me if you still need help
Pokegeologist
What I thought was a memory problem is making me want to just nuke my HDD. backing up all my shit ahead of the planned infopocalypse.
Pokegeologist
So on a whim, I decided while I had the case open, I wanted to tidy up my cables. Ended up putting my HDD on a different power cable...
Pokegeologist
Also moved the SATA cable to another open port on the motherboard. PC finally shuts down properly and so far (6+ hours) runs like it should.
namiasdf
For engineering assignments, I'd caffeine up, and just go wherever the programming took me. Eventually I'd end up somewhere, and then
namiasdf
spend equal time reverse engineering what I did, cause I just wrote to function, without really thinking about it all.
namiasdf
In the end, it lets you see top-bottom what you want to build, so you can build it bottom-top with all the hindsight in the world.
namiasdf
Takes twice as long though, and isn't viable economically.
sangatster
idk, I think that is where the real skills come from. Find a thing that you find interesting and learn about it in depth.
LastElf
Also the game Factorio, which happens to have a lot of developers that play it
etopsirhc
yeah, love that game!
sunyudai
Yet another factorio playing dev here.
BenSnow97
They forgot the first commandment
awildcharmander
Am dev, play game, can confirm
doubledoubleanimalstyle
I wanna play it but I'm afraid I'm too dumb. Do you need to be smart?
wurdtoyer
You can join our group if you want. No smarts required. DM me.
sunyudai
No, but you need to be able to be able to handle tedium, and putting together simple blocks to build complex systems.
SuperbBackhand
As a dev, that and rimworld are probably my favorite games
Noevilgifs
Have you tried sk hardmode modpack for rimworld? It makes it super immersive
SuperbBackhand
Oh snap, is that the equivalent of a modpack?! If it had it's own version of feed the beast, that'd be epic!
Noevilgifs
Yes just search it up, they even have a github with a launcher and everything, amazing!
Noevilgifs
https://ludeon.com/forums/index.php?topic=12996.0 leaving this for anyone who wants a look, 1.0 is coming soon