I did the math on making a black hole out of Captain Cheetoh

Aug 20, 2024 2:30 AM

So being generous and assuming he has a mass of only 150kg (~approx 330lb), as I seriously doubt that his claimed weight is remotely accurate...

The Schwarzschild Radius gives the radius of a black hole, which can be doubled to get the diameter*.

Where:
G is the gravitational constant (6.67430×10^−11  m^3 kg^−1  s^−2)
M is the mass of the black hole (160 kg in this case)
c is the speed of light (2.998×10^8 m/s)

* I prefer diameter to radius because when measuring something, one looks at the distance from one side to the other. For circular and spherical objects that typically is done with calipers, not that you can put calipers on a black hole, but whatever. Besides, Pi is only half the constant Tau is.

Hawking Radiation and Lifespan: The lifespan τ of a black hole can be estimated using the formula:

Where:
ℏ is the reduced Planck's constant (1.0545718×10^−34 m^2 kg/s)

This formula tells us how long a black hole of a given mass will last before it evaporates into nonexistence.

The end result is this:

The Trump Black Hole would be 4.75×10^−25 meters across, and have a lfie span of 3.44×10^10 seconds.

In easier to understand terms, that's approximately 475 yoctometers with a lifespan of 0.344 nanoseconds or 344 picoseconds.

Since everybody is probably familiar with the concept of a nanosecond, and I explained it in nanoseconds for lifespan, but yoctometers are kind of obscure, here's how the nomenclature works...

Deci- (d-): 10^−1
Centi- (c-): 10^−2
Milli (m-): 10^−3
Micro- (µ-): 10^−6
Nano- (n-): 10^−9
Pico- (p-): 10^−12
Femto- (f-): 10^−15
Atto- (a-): 10^−18
Zepto- (z-): 10^−21
Yocto- (y-): 10^−24

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The duration sounds a bit too long to me... I mean, the calcs might be right, but I wish it would be shorter by 10^10000

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

"Besides, Pi is only half the constant Tau is."
Nerd burn!

1 year ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

The resulting energy released from a black hole evaporation in a fraction of a fraction of a second would also make Hiroshima look like a wet firecracker

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

+1 for difficult math

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

whoa!

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Wut

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

*math noises*

1 year ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

344 picoseconds is still too long to have to endure his existence.

1 year ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

Okay but if he did turn into a black hole on earth wouldn't he continously consume the mass around him and be seld sustaining?

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

No, because the black hole would still only have the mass and therefore gravitational pull that he had before becoming black hole. 150kg is still 150kg, no matter the density.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

No, a black hole’s ability to consume matter is limited by its size. This one would be much smaller than a proton. It would evaporate before it got to consume much of anything. Even if it got lucky and nabbed an atom or two it wouldn’t make any difference.

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That is of course also assuming it could consume anything... People point black assume "black hole = cosmic vacuum" but that's not the case. If the sun became a black hole with the mass of the sun right this second, the planets would not get sucked into it because its mass is still 1 solar mass. Everything would continue on exactly as it has, except in darkness.

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1