absinthemindedprofessor
386399
575
62
. . . but the wife doesn't.
Jun 7, 2025 12:28 AM
absinthemindedprofessor
386399
575
62
. . . but the wife doesn't.
11Weasel11
I miss my python Fluffy. He was a Borneo Blood python and a very good boy. He is on the prohibited reptile list in Florida, so I had to give him up to move back. I donated him to a place that does reptile themed educational events for kids. He was such a cool noodle.
Bojovnik84
Yeah, no. Those kids will end up food the minute you miss a feeding or two. You can train a cat. Or get a dog. Or a bird. And if you must have a reptile, a turtle or a bearded dragon.
GODzillaFH
Calling an animal that proably runs 99% on instinct "good natured" is sooo...human. Aka stupid. ^^
ChewyTheWookie
Just make sure to wash hands after petting the neighbors rabbits
pickledpunk021
https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPTY1YjkxZmJlZGM1ZHdtODhrd2hldmQ1N2pqYzJuNXZhc2ljMzlpNnpvdnN4cGszcyZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/xUA7b6UEuNWSxe5Wgw/giphy.mp4
76000BatteryLlamas
Uhhhhhhhhh
Chronomechanist
Love snakes but I absolutely hate videos where they have so clearly cut up someone's audio. It's been chopped so much there no way to tell what the person was originally saying.
JeremyPeevin
I've watched pythons murder people, full grown adults trained in handling them. I've never watched a housecat kill a fully grown adult, trained or no. So letting my kid handle a python, that's gonna be a no from me dawg.
kaegro
I love reptiles, and they *do* experience attachment and form some degree of bonds - but it's important to remember they are *animals* and can be easily spooked or confused and do terrible things in their confusion. I agree with the post that the girl is probably safer with the snakes than a house cat or dog, as their needs and limits are less complicated, but under no conditions should anyone be handling snakes of that size alone. God love em, but they're solid muscle with peanut brains.
Rastifaan
Bleeding idiots. Snakes are all instinct. If the latter kicks in alone with the kids... Get a fucking cat.
sociowrath
I'm not afraid of snakes but they seem like a pretty useless pet.
Zedrapazia
I wouldn't exactly say that my two housecats serve much or a purpose either tbh. Or the salamander I had, my neighbor's hamster, or the dog of my best friend.
If an animal brings you joy and company, that's purpose enough. :3
Fishkeeper
They're not a utility animal, they're a pet you keep because you enjoy looking at them.
Cully74
Here's what can happen
https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/new-brunswick/snake-kills-2-n-b-boys-after-escaping-store-rcmp-say-1.1340560
KirbyUOR
What was the outcome of the investigation? Any charges filed?
Cully74
The owner of the snake was charged with criminal negligence causing death but was not convicted. he often left it unsecure in the shop downstairs but the crown couldn't make the case beyond a reasonable doubt.
https://globalnews.ca/news/3058547/python-owner-found-not-guilty-in-deaths-of-new-brunswick-boys/
Lassannn
If anyone ever botherss you, they'll ssee jusst how ssssnakelike I can be!
zylokun
i love you noodle friends.
Tolocamp
Snakes are cool. Putting shade on cats seems unnecessary to drive the point home, i think. Two different things, both amazing in their own right.
Fishkeeper
Alright, look- snakes aren't evil mindless killing machines, but these /are/ quite large constrictors. Their natural behavior when climbing something is to coil around it to hold on. It's not recommended for a human of any age to handle a snake at this size without plenty of professional help because, if it happens to coil around your neck while climbing, it's a very strong animal that will be very difficult to remove before you pass out. Not because it's trying to kill you, but because it's
Fishkeeper
found itself on a perch that's suddenly unstable and it's trying not to fall. This is really not a good idea. Also, I sure hope they don't just have the snakes free-roaming, because that's not good for the snakes- they belong in a climate-controlled enclosure, not loose in a house. They're not cats.
Fishkeeper
(they are right that "oh, the snake stretched out next to you, it was measuring you to see if it could eat you!" is bullshit, though.)
IceWeaselX
Chin up, @OP. Your wife's just telling you that she's more than satisfied with the pair of balls and python you bring to the table.
Becker37
No
senzykyo3004
I love snakes the Burmese is pretty. Thought the other was a ball python but the eyes are wrong.
subnetmask
Whatabsolutehorseshit.gif
Daemencer
Snakes do not feel empathy or affection towards us. That can get used to our smell and presence and not be aggressive but that won't feel like cats or dogs who are domesticated do. Still, one hell of a pet to have at home but I dislike that this video says it's better than a cat to have as a pet, it's just not comparable.
thesunisgettingreallow
Ball pythons are nice but neither of these snakes are ball pythons. It appears to be a reticulated and a Burmese
cepacolusmaximus
and Burmese can be temperamental
GabbyJayYay
The kid is reading up on it
mcmachack
Ball Pythons are rather small and such cowards that it's basically like having a house plant that occasionally moves
KaptainObveeus
My friend had one that shyly came out of it's rock to say hello. I sneezed and it zoinked back into hiding not to be seen the rest of the day.
SnailsAgainstTungstenSpheres
A Venus mousetrap
Thorfred
Had to come back to this comment once I understood its brilliance. +1 to you!
SnailsAgainstTungstenSpheres
https://media4.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1a2o2bmRja25tZno2bTh3ejFyczI0ZmhtbDZzZjY5M2N4NHpvNmdrdiZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/gpP18dtmlplle/200w.webp thanks, cheers buddy
ladyfirewitch9000
I don't know that OP saying they wanted Ball Pythons was meant to suggest that the snakes in the video WERE Ball Pythons
MajinHercule
Ah. Reticulated and Burmese with a little girl. What could go wrong.
SpaceEagle63
I had a Columbian Red boa as a pet when I was a kid. I can confirm everything in the video. Raised correctly, they're great pets.
Fishkeeper
And raising them correctly involves safe handling practices, which "surrounded by a snake significantly larger than you are" is not. Less because it might attack and more because if it coils around your neck by chance, just trying to hold on and climb, you're in big trouble.
Saismirk
Colombian
Alkuam2
RARusk
Poppypoppoppop
Its not about not trusting the animal, but rather about its owner unproper care of it.
"the python was kept upstairs in a custom-built glass enclosure similar to an aquarium.
The cage reached the ceiling, and the snake was somehow able to crawl through a vent into the building’s ductwork. It was above the living room, where the boys were sleeping, when the ceiling fell in.
The snake was found in the same room as the boys..."
Fishkeeper
I'd be very skeptical of that, frankly. Snakes don't kill multiple food items at a time, for one. No reason to. For another, you need an absolutely enormous snake to consider a human, even a kid, to be a potential food item.
Fishkeeper
Asterisk: they don't kill multiple /large/ food items at a time. A large rat snake might eat multiple mice. But a python isn't going to, say, kill one deer and then decide to kill another deer instead of eating the first one, and once it's eaten the first one it's gonna be too full to look for a second.
Qualtagh
...did the falling ceiling kill them? I'm so confused about how a constrictor could kill a kid without the other one waking up
Cricketecho
Went down a rabbit hole on this one. Looks like the most plausible version (via experts) is that the 15ft long, 100 lb snake fell out of the ceiling 8ft above the boys, onto their heads and chests, stunning/seriously injuring them. Then, being a panicked snake, constricted, which ultimately killed the children who were laying next to each other in the same bed. A horribly tragic one in a million accident, but not likely an attack since the snake made no attempt to consume either child.
Qualtagh
god damn, what a weird case
ladyfirewitch9000
Thanks for the digging
AlmostHappy
Dunno. 5 and 7 may sleep in the same bed and get crushed together in one big hug.
Fishkeeper
That's not a thing snakes do.
SailorPupitar
Comparing them to cats that bite or scratch frequently is kinda the same thing that led to pitbulls getting a bad rep as aggressive dogs.
They don't need to attack often or be aggressive. if the attack happens it kills or severely injures most of the time
AlmostHappy
Haven’t heard about a cat killing any human bigger than a few weeks old.
SailorPupitar
Oh that's good news for the pythons then
Fishkeeper
Probably through infection.
IamTOOOLDforThisShite
They're perfectly safe ... right up until they're not.
You might judge the risk as "LOW" but it is never ZERO.
KyleZombie
You could say that about her too.
ThanksForTheThing
You're talking about cats right?
pooFIinger
Yeah, kids are a menace. Stay away from them.
jaggcomputing5
Life is full of risks.
iLoveItWhenMyFingersSmellLikePussy
Same is true for dogs..
Drmantislovesegg
Especially pitbulls.
dashers
Any animal really. And it comes down to whether that animal is going to be big enough and strong enough to do lasting damage to the size/strength humans you have in the home.
AlexSomething
That's why I'm keeping a Bengal tiger as a pet. Either it plays nice and all is well, or it mauls me and I'm dead so it's not my problem anymore.
iLoveItWhenMyFingersSmellLikePussy
I got bit by a smallish dog who got startled, wound didn't heal well, even with medical supervision.. Left me with a big ugly scar on my leg.. Also know of too many people getting bit by dogs.. Any "cute" video of dogs near kids makes me uncomfortable.. Ex gf had a scar from getting bit in the face when she was a kid
Probablyimaginary
My landlady back in the 2000's had half her ear ripped off by a 'friendly parrot'. Folks just have biases, most animals we keep can fuck is up. Now I feel like similarly as you at those cute babies with birds videos.
SomebodyalreadytookMyPants
The chances of one killing your kids go down significantly if you don't have them in your house. Kids or Pythons for that matter.
Cebrail
The chance of one of your kids dying goes down if you don't have guns, knives, stairs, glass, hard edges, poisonous substances, alcohol, drugs or literally anything else in your house as well. Oh and dogs, cats, other pets as well. In fact, maybe keep the kids in a padded safe-room.
Or don't have kids :)
EleganceIsDead
I'd be ok with the Pythons, the kid(s), not so much. -_- LOL!
KuroFluff
Who can afford exotic pets like that? I mean college alone...
BeaverOnFire
Slewth87
I'm sure it's probably happened, but I've literally never heard of a pet snake killing a kid. Pet dogs on the other hand. . .
showmeathing
Honestly thought you were talking about not having kids in the house and I was thinking yeah absolutely right but some poor suckers get too attached to them and can't throw them away...
EleganceIsDead
It would seem many in Florida would disagree with you, since it would appear, many assorted Pythons have moved into the "wilderness," there. -_- LOL!
Pelican3
Moved in to stay. Say hello to the Everglades Python. 90% of the mammals in the Everglades are gone due to these invasive and apparently very hungry predators.
ProfessorBanesworth
@stonedlikeicheckedoutmedusa Time to add to your menagerie?
stonedlikeicheckedoutmedusa
I have 3 snakes silly! One is a python :) Granted he won’t get that big (we don’t have the room for a burm or a retic)
ProfessorBanesworth
Oh I knew about the two hognoses, of course, but I didn't know about the python! Or I've forgotten since my mind has become a sieve in my advanced age. :P
stonedlikeicheckedoutmedusa
Haha idk if I’ve shown Mausoleum; I’ll try to tomorrow for snake Sunday
OddSoull
snakes dont have the capacity to have affection, Sure they can "NOT" be aggressive and very docile, but IF its hungry and wants food and its small enough to eat it will try
ElbowDeepInAHeadlessHorseman
From what I've read, it's more that they can get confused easily. Like if you're trying to feed one or preparing food for them, they can get confused about what's the food once they start smelling it. But I ain't an expert :p
AtMetaphase
There is actually lots of evidence in the animal behaviour literature of reptiles preferring to live in social situations and displaying guarding of nests, young, and mates. They display novelty seeking and can have positive associative learning. Most pleasure and memory take place largely in the amygdala and hippocampus which are highly conserved. There will be different degrees of affiliative connections formed for sure, but difference of degree not a lack of capacity.
Fishkeeper
Fortunately you need a very, VERY big snake for a human of any walking size to be a potential food item. None of those are big enough.
stonedlikeicheckedoutmedusa
That’s just plain false. Things still have to register as “food” to the python: certain smells and temperatures and heat signatures They don’t see humans as food. They might strike if they’re cage defensive but that’s because they see you as a PREDATOR not PREY. I hate when uneducated people spout this crap.
KoalaOnTheJuice
There no way I would trust a snake's reptilian brain to not respond to food stimuli instinctively. No way at all.
stonedlikeicheckedoutmedusa
Humans aren’t food for snakes. Even the huge ones don’t see us as food; they accidentally asphyxiate people they don’t attempt to eat them
KoalaOnTheJuice
Not with the lives of my small children anyway.
DorgEndo
Snakes/reptiles take well to training. Snakes especially don't eat every day. A lot might only eat once a week or every other week as adults. You follow a routine of feeding tongs, tapping tongs with the food around the enclosure door is common to give the same visual, auditory, vibration, and same smell signals so snake knows it's food time. They learn that signal for food it's really effective. Lizards are more likely to chomp since they actively hunt instead of ambush
stonedlikeicheckedoutmedusa
I love how uneducated people downvote factual info. Yikes. Upvote for knowledge and proper husbandry
Stefnos
thats about the same as 40% of humans these days >.>
sheslikeheroin
While thia is a common viewpoint there are zero studie that back it up. Its based on the same assumptions than humans are special and all other life are merely automatons. Crappy keeper routinely push this narrative to justify their neglect. I have multiple snakes whonif the miss a daynor twomof out time refuse to eat
blackelf
You are not quite correct, my fried: I thought the same, until I was introduced to a king cobra: they are crazy smart. Your house cat will attack you when hungry before it does.
People think the same of many reptiles, but experience shows this to be false: Check out the story of Pocho the Crocodile, check out the recordings. It is clearly affectionate and playful, understanding the man was their friend.
Hippos, despite being mammals, on the other Hand,k I would not trust, EVER!
OddSoull
Oh i'm not talking about all reptiles i've owned many Tengu's before and been with larger tortoises who can be trained by name or (auditory) Snakes are a different story in my opinion. You could call it a personality, but docile or not they just dont have the capacity to feel love. You are a large moving heated rock that sometimes moves in a way to scratch areas.
PlanckEraWasMyBestEra
I imagine hippos have a similar emotional range and understanding. They just really like to murder things. There are people like that too!
blackelf
I think they have a crazy temper, and sometimes cannot control it, see Marius Els.
That's why Pocho was so super fascinating: Never ever have I seem such a reptile being so gentle. He could have killed Chito on a whim, not choose not to, until his death.
minqapoc
Your house cat can bite chunks out of you and eat them, you are therefor "prey". A king cobra can't do that and can't swallow you. Why would it even TRY to attack you and make you food?
blackelf
Oh, once your dead your flesh becomes very loose, and of course a king cobra could feed of it.
How did you come to the conclusion that we remain "tender" after death?
minqapoc
........did you read the part about chewing bits off? Which a cobra can't do?
blackelf
Don't worry, after a few days of decomposition it will take bits out of you no problem.
Even Great Tits eat fallen soldiers in Ukraine: you think they can take a bite out of a living person?