OnixSwan
48175
1538
52
Feb 23, 2025 5:54 PM
OnixSwan
48175
1538
52
lAmGnomeAnn
I am an introvert in that I get my energy from being quiet and alone, but I have no issue telling someone when their bullshit stinks.
loma45
That has nothing to do with being an introvert - it's just poor conflict resolution skills. This is definitely one of the dumber "pop psych" takes I've seen lately.
Pyresryke
This sort of self fellating bullshit is sincerely annoying. You don't speak for all introverts and I'd bet a whole penny you're a lot more conflict filled and hurtful than you would prefer others believe.
allcattywampus
and then post passive-aggressively about it on the internet
leroy666
I think you underestimate introverts. “Revenge is a dish best served cold.”
nutmegonyourdoodle
Cold and greasy, in a to go container.
SterlingArcherSecretAgent
Not all of us are like that.
SweetLittleKitsune
People constantly mix up socially anxious and introvert. This is talking about someone with social anxiety not introversion. Source: I'm an extrovert with social anxiety (yea, it sucks) and this lines up with how I act.
SterlingArcherSecretAgent
I truly hate feeling ignored, which is why I never ignore others, at least not on purpose. I don't mind people not paying attention to me, it's actively ignoring me that's an issue for me. I'd much rather be told "no" or "go away" etc. than just be ghosted. Being ghosted means I have to figure out the reason for the lack of response, and my brain always come up with reasons making me feel bad. I won't do that to others. Even getting blocked is better than ignored, since it's a message in itself.
AranaDiscoteca
I don't think ghosting is an introvert trait.
Fantelroy
What?
I'm an introvert because I find people emotionally draining. You fuck me over, I'll burn your metphorical house down
Copperbrat
As an old introvert, I can assure you if you hurt me or someone I love I will spend a large chunk of my free time covertly fucking you over.
daojones75
As a middle-aged introvert I'm still willing to be overt about it. I'm not passive-aggressive, I'm passive/aggressive.
DildorTheMighty
Yep. Though it also depends on how badly I've been hurt.
Froggie243
I've learned for me there is a bell curve. Small slights I'll let go. Something bigger but I still have respect and a desire for friendship, it'll be tough but let's talk it out (even though I hate conflict). Slow burn abuse, it's ghosting time.
2000000bees
Indeed. I'm rarely pissed off enough for someone to know it, but when I am I will tell them quietly and apparently quite devastatingly exactly why. I'm happy with that.
lampinamothpit
Same. Long fuse, cold fury.
insertwittyjoke
Introversion isn't a synonym for being shy or awkward or soft spoken. I'm an introvert and have no problem saying what's on my mind
lospaturno
extrovert here: i do the same.
phant0mfoxes
As I get older, the threshold for this drops, honestly. My time and emotional energy mean more to me now and if you're 100% a taker, start drama for the sake of alleviating boredom, treat me well but others poorly etc .. life is just too short and if my solitude is preferable to your company, I'mma wish you well and head out
RacecarIsRacecarBackwards
I think it's cruel to just ignore people who think they're your friend. My wife lost one of her best friends that way, when they were trying the "phase out" their friendship by just not responding any more. She was genuinely worried about them because all her texts went unanswered and it broke her heart.
If you want to break up a friendship, tell people about it. It may be tough, but at least they won't be forever worrying about what they did wrong.
hyperchondriac
I'm gonna save my breath on the well wishes.
phant0mfoxes
Fair enough, lol. This sounds self-serving but I find it just makes the exit cleaner. If you try to chew them out or you're hostile about it, they'll keep thinking about you and talking about you or reaching out and trying to "fix" it (try to change/control how you see them, in many cases) or whatever. If you make like.. a fond fade, a warm exit, idk how to say it - they don't think about you and you can truly ghost away lol
ForceKinTim
Gonna pour my heart out, but here goes - yesterday, my aunt contacted me. I didn't know i had an aunt. My entire father's side of the family never contacted me since my parents divorced when i was 1yo. To contact me when i am in my 30s honestly made me so mad. I was over all feelings and was living completely in peace. To invade my life in this way was honestly insulting
Froggie243
Had something similar. I've left the message unread on fb for 7 years. Why contact me now? What do you want? What kind of drama could this unravel? I'm too tired for all of that.
catmonger
While I somewhat agree - I think this post glorifies unhealthy coping mechanisms. If anyone crosses boundaries with you, instead of quietly drifting away sometimes you need to vocalize how others may have wronged you and be clear. (Especially in valued relationships)
ProgeriaProstitutes
If you don't tell someone you hurt them in some way they might not even know.
Lulabel73
This was not written by an introvert.
Feralkyn
Lmao no.
Nanoline
"Hey, we didn't hear from you over Christmas."
Me, leaving them on read again: "Yeah well once you decided Shitler was the best person to be King of America, after a couple years of trying to convince you off that path, I'm out of fucks to give about you and yours. Wasted too much energy for too long trying to convince you of something mind-numbingly obvious, but your two brain cells are busy fighting to the death for third place, so I'm gonna do something productive instead. Like Solitaire."
Safflower777
Ignore them. That's fine. But do not ignore the collossal mess they created! It needs fixing!!!!!! Now!
RooGryphon
Exactly and they always try to trip you into a debate about it. I.D.G.A.F.
Gaelwyn
I told my parents a while ago (I think it was back when BLM protests first started) that me not responding to their bullshit texts/emails/whatever is not me agreeing with them, it's simply me not wanting to engage with them on the topic. My dad felt I owed him a discussion if I disagreed with him so he got pretty pissed off about it, but I don't owe him anything so he can get fucked. Not engaging has been amazingly good for my mental health.
nutmegonyourdoodle
I have blocked a family member. A person I once considered creative and interesting. That bullshit took him over like darkness. No more creativity. I won’t listen to Kompromat from a Soviet sympathizer.
meowingintensifies
then they cry that you disowned them, in order to break your no contact. And at that point, it's pointless to argue with their conclusion.
ThisIsMyUsernameThereAreManyLikeIt
Beware the anger of a calm person.
judithCat
I'm a great believer of serving it cold myself and it not been expected, so the shock becomes double; but sometimes just sometimes I call it out there and then.....
Rips4w
My philosophy is if you don't match my involvement in a relationship, platonic or not, my default action is to set said involvement to zero. I'm not interested in teaching anyone lessons or making them feel bad. If you don't have an innate baseline of decency involving the treatment and respect of others, including their time and emotions, then we won't ever mesh. It can seem uncaring, but it's the opposite. I care a fucking bunch. I just won't force things that aren't there.
waxNracks
This isn’t about introverts, it’s anyone with an avoidant attachment style. Extroverts too. Know your attachment style!!
brrrackobama
There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.
ArchSchnitz
Nah.
I count myself as an introvert (though a very extroverted one). I carefully, slowly plotted a revenge for years after someone pissed me off.
DukeSliscus
Or they craft an intricate revenge that you'll never know they were behind and everyone will just say "I guess karma caught up with him"
GrandmasterSpank
I have a list of names, all I need is good opportunities so it can't be traced back to me. But I don't forget.
StrandedonEarth
Yup, duck and cover
bassaro
I prefer goose and blanket. You throw a blanket over them and a goose, and let the goose do the work.
stupidbastardinutah
As an introvert, if you cross me, I'll fuck your shit up.
elusivekarma
@SparkleDogg
SparkleDogg
Oh, yep. I mean, it depends on how much I value the relationship and whether I think addressing ruptures is worth the effort (do I think they’ll be capable of discussion and repair, etc)
If I don’t think the ROI is likely to be there, yeah. Bye
dankymang
It might not be today, or next week or next year but it will be planned and it will be just.
lospaturno
and i'm an extrovert who does what OP said. so maybe it doesn't correlate at all
SisyphusAndRock
Right?! Depending on tge grievance they'll either be door slammed or worse incur vengeance which is the last thing you want from someone who spends their life internalising, keeping to themselves, thinking & learning
LadyMalborough
Also as an introvert, this has "loyal but dangerous," "I can be your angel or your devil" energy.
JuicyHorseMuff
X
pvtsquirel
Yeah I don't know what this post is yapping about, I'm introverted, not conflict avoidant. I absolutely do not disappear quietly, I burn the fuck out of those bridges.
nutmegonyourdoodle
pvtsquirel
Table5
I'll fly down from Canada to help this fucker too. Try us.
cropduster5000
Oregonian here, I’d love an excuse for a roadtrip. Count me in
nutmegonyourdoodle
Oregonia , love you dearly. Beautiful place.
SilverDust133
Fuck with me and I’ll let it slide. Fuck with friends and family that don’t deserve it and it’s a short fuse.
n0gal
I'm in my 30's now, I'm small, always have been, pretty easy going, was bullied here and there back in high school, I let most of it slide. My little sister eventually got into highschool and some kid was fucking with her. I still don't know how much adrenaline it took to lift that kid by his neck and plant him against the lockers by it, but he never did it again.
TussleTheCat
While in HS, my sister's bf at the time beat the shit out of her. I was in college. I drove 2 hours to that bitch boy's house in the middle of the night, pulled him outside and proceeded to break his entire face. Told him to never go near her again or I'd be back and he'd be dead. They broke up and 10 years later my sis is happily married to a wonderful man and they just had my beautiful princess of a niece. I'm chill as a cucumber, but do NOT fuck with my people. No regerts, not one.
ArrogantLoudMouthedBother
Literally, this. I only recognize bad behavior from people when it happens to a loved one. Even if it's happened to me many times before.
gingen
This 100%. One does not simply fuck with me and mine. ESPECIALLY mine. >:|
Syovere
Mhm. When I was a chronically-oblivious, underweight, out of shape teenager, on a group camping trip even I could tell this one grown-ass man was trying to get in my cousin's pants. Which was a problem since she was younger than me - 15, maybe 16.
So that man could not go around a corner without finding me. Watching. Waiting. Followed his ass all over the campground, more walking than I'd ever done before just shadowing the creep.
(dad saw the same thing I did, so I wasn't misreading it.)
BeardedViking
Alright, let's take this outside buddy.
bassaro
Ew, outside? That's where the nature is.
ExceptFluffyDuck
*other people. Nature is nice.
LuminoZero
Everyone likes to ignore the concept of accidental hurt. If you don't COMMUNICATE that you have been hurt by what somebody says or does, then you're just sacrificing relationships to indulge in your own self-isolation.
If you tell them they hurt you, and they make excuses or keep doing it, then by all means cut them out of your life. But you at least owe people ONE chance to make things right. Perspective can be a bitch.
RacecarIsRacecarBackwards
Exactly. I wouldn't even call this an introvert thing. Some people are just afraid of tough decisions and conflict and would rather ignore the other person forever than to have one uncomfortable conversation with them. It can be really hurtful and confusing being ghosted by someone you thought was your friend and never knowing what you may have done wrong.
veesee
Nah man, you don't owe anyone anything except yourself. I'm not putting up with any shit anymore and I'm not giving chances to people who are just not good people for the sake of chance.
I've learned that there are deal breakers for me and I don't owe anyone an explanation. Further more, abusers use those explanations against you. You tell them exactly how to hurt you, you're giving them a map.
LuminoZero
"Nah man, you don't owe anyone anything except yourself."
You wrote this and don't see it as a huge problem? You need to speak to a therapist, dude.
veesee
I see a therapist regularly. Do you? You've got a whole lot of anger. And I never said you owe anyone anything. That comment was also made in a totally different context and on a micro scale versus this comment which is being made on a macro scale.
Context is important :). Have a better day!
LuminoZero
'Whole lot of anger'? At what point in this conversation have I displayed the tiniest bit of anger?
Is this just that thing where somebody losing an argument says 'u mad bro?' before running away?
RacecarIsRacecarBackwards
If you want to end a relationship, there needs to be a breakup. You can't leave people completely unsure of what they may have done wrong. It could break their heart.
Blud4BludGod
I agree, except I'd say that you don't owe that chance to other people- you owe it to yourself. Cutting yourself out of potentially meaningful relationships by slowly and quietly emotionally withdrawing whenever things get slightly difficult or messy is not a good life strategy, if you want to have quality friends or romantic relationships.
nostradumasss
Or... sometimes they wait until no one will know who retaliated in order to do so. No one suspects that person who never appears to be upset.
HankHell2400
This comment, and every other comment I saw replying to it, is seriously some of the most cringy edgelord shit ever.
ByteeBandit
Hankhell2400... ohhhh buddy. Now is NOT the time to insult the introverts by calling them cringy edgelords. You may have been noted already. Not that youll ever know.....
75townecoupe
Shit. Now I have to add Hank to my list.... I don't have TIME for this
weedeewee
GermanSausagesAreTheWurst
That reminds me, I have a list somewhere.
macrolet
When a good man goes to war.
yoyo42
Don't mistake my kindness for weakness.
neospor1n
My first tennis coach said ‘be quiet and carry a big stick’. Not sure how he knew about my penis? But snyways…
Safflower777
There ya go.
Putitinyomama
DemonDarakna
I admit NOTHING, officer!
GermanSausagesAreTheWurst
Never forget that if you don't explicitly state that you are invoking the 5th Amendment, your silence can be used against you.
DemonDarakna
Actually it's article 29 in our core constitution of fundamental rights and article 83 of the criminal procedure in my country.
Ya don't need amendments when it's there from the start ^^
ByteeBandit
I recently found out one of my friends new flatmates was one of these people I was waiting on, for at least a couple of years. They did me reeal dirty. I just recently smeared tuna paste behind there electrical fitting covers by the bedside table. She's gonna have fun explaining the fish smell emanating from her room muahahahaaaa
GermanSausagesAreTheWurst
One of my favorites is to get them drunk and then call the police to report a DUI.
ByteeBandit
Try avoid harming their lively hood if ya can. A DUI has some real life affecting reprocussions. Family, image, and income are off limits imo. Starting up a click bait ad for penis enlargements using there Facebook image however.... yes I did this. Found out through there fb what there schedule was (turn off location services people) and spammed a click bait article with his image asking "are you also a wee little winky boy ?" In those areas
GermanSausagesAreTheWurst
Little play-games like that do nothing. People don't learn from subtlety or nuance. They have to be hit over the head with it, or it has no effect. Go big or go home.
GermanSausagesAreTheWurst
The lack of ruthlessness and making certain actions "off limits" are why we got Trump and why we won't be able to get rid of him. Either toughen up, or bend over.
ByteeBandit
Depends on the scale imo. It's kinda funny vicariously watching wee little winky boy plead to anyone on how to make it all go away. He's currently trying to pay, I will extend my services eventually and make a nice cash dollar to take it down
75townecoupe
Oh, we will fuck you up.... As long as I don't have to talk to anybody
tallyhoho
Are you...me?
ignotoCiResto
we are... *whisper* legion
75townecoupe
*whispers* we are Bob
darkninja2992
Extroverts are warriors, introverts are assassins.
Anarchduke
Introverts can be warriors. Because people don't tend to talk to you when you are carrying an axe and shield.
HandoB4Javert
mrmartini
Yup. The long game. Count of Monte Cristo style. Years of plotting.
barstr7
Hell yes. I will quietly go away… or so you think. I will wait until you've forgotten my name, my face and the incident for which I'm seeking revenge. I will nurture that grudge like a sapling until it bears sweet fruit.
Xendrash
I've waited 13 years, I can wait another 13 more.
mrmartini
Don't forget to stew in the hatred until you become so consumed in it you forget what you were even upset about in the first place. Change your identity and buy an evil lair. A sidekick is a MUST.
OmbreMallards
Not if that sidekick is a dog or cat!
zerogiven
A sidekick might want to TALK to me!
somethingsomethingwittyhere
Maybe this one then! With deprecated OS and only 3G connectivity (that's being phased out), nobody's going to call you!